Having just refilled my cup of coffee this morning, I returned to my seat at breakfast, passing our bus driver Jacob in the narrow aisle between tables on the way. With no where else to look we locked eyes, and I instinctively offered him a smile. For a few seconds not even recognition registered on his face, but in the last moment before we fully passed, he gave the slightest nod and quickly returned his eyes to directly in front of him. The sequence of events was not uncomfortable—we both acted in accordance with the practices we’ve been taught since childhood—but it was an indication of a broader difference in our culture’s values: privacy.
Over the past week, Ólöf has made references to the unique way Icelandic people interact with each other, and yesterday she finally coined the idea with the term “social privacy”. Its roots track back through history to the times of turf houses and a need for heat.With the incredibly limited vegetation across Iceland’s rocky terrain, early inhabitants of the island were without a reliable source of fuel for fires. To compensate, they built turf buildings that would house a sizable number of people and therefore relied on body heat alone to maintain liveable conditions within the structures.
Based on her description of these houses and their limited number of beds (another way to ensure warmth through the night), I was rather bothered by the lack of privacy and could not comprehend how people would be willing to live in such fashion. However, she continued on to describe the ways in which they navigated the crowded living space and explained how they gave each other “social privacy” at a time where physical privacy was impossible. Essentially, privacy became a matter of respect and common understanding.
While the turf houses are long gone (really less than 100 years gone, but that’s beside the point), these social practices are not. The Icelandic people build an impressive degree of privacy without any physical boundaries. Ólöf explained that it has advantages and disadvantages; on one hand the Icelandic people are often more accepting of historically outcast communities because they simply mind their own business, but on the other hand this can lead to what is essentially a widespread bystander effect where certain situations are neglected.
With this in mind, I find I have a completely changed perspective on how I would fit into Icelandic society. Initially opposed to the illusion of a lack of privacy, I have found that Icelandic culture aligns quite well with what I value and practice. “Social privacy” is something I wish could be more widely adopted in the US as I think it may greatly benefit our perception of acceptance and respect. Perhaps it seems counterintuitive, but Jacob showed this respect in his lack of smile. With that small action he displayed a much larger part of Icelandic culture, and I am appreciative that he does not adapt his practices in accordance with the nationality of those whom he drives. Otherwise, it might not have been so obvious that cultural differences manifest in even the smallest and most nuanced ways.
Swanson School of Engineering 